I was eight when I was sent from England to relatives in Goa for four years, a wonderful experience that increased my resilience and sense of belonging
At eight, I was sent from England to live with relatives in Goa for four years. The experience shook me out of my timid existence and led to a profound sense of belongingplane with my aunt, leaving my parents and baby sister in the south of England, and flew to live with my maternal grandparents in a tiny fishing town south of Goa. At a time when many Indians were emigrating to Britain in search of a more prosperous life, I seemed to be the only brown person going in the other direction.
In the sliding doors version where I stayed put with my family, I suspect I would have plodded through life in England being the quiet kid with soda-bottle glasses and curly black hair, who would have had some sort of rebellion as a teenager involving Nirvana and piercings. As it happens, the door I walked through in India shook me out of my timid existence. The suburban streets I grew up on back in Kent were quiet and tree-lined, where nothing much ever happened.
In western countries, with both parents working long hours and commuting, a lot of kids don’t get much one-on-one time within their family, as they are moved from childminders to school or afterschool clubs. I, on the other hand, was always surrounded by family.
It helped, of course, that while my grandparents were loving and watchful, they also largely left me to my own devices. At an age where my mum and dad would normally be fixing any problems I had, sorting out issues at school or just offering life advice, I was figuring out a lot of things myself .
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