While having cancer had been hard, I found the period after I was declared cancer-free absolutely horrific.
When everything stops, all of that support and structure goes away Most people are relieved when they get the phone call to say they are cancer-free. When the hospital rang to tell me in the spring of 2020, my mum burst into tears, overjoyed. But I quietly slipped away to my bedroom. I cried because I knew all the support, care and routine I had been given while being treated was about to disappear.
Those eight weeks between having surgery and getting the all clear were a blur of contact and information, going back and forth to the hospital for appointments, tests and scans of every kind imaginable. It was oddly reassuring: there was always something to do or focus on, and I was being monitored all the time. But when everything stops, all of that support and structure goes away. I felt like a toy that had been dropped: that’s it, move on, we’ll see you in three months for a check up.
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