Dear Amy: I’m now 71. I want to come clean with my son/family.
Dear Amy: For the past 50 years, I have lied that I was in the military and served in Vietnam.I ran away from a bad home life at 13 and lived on the streets. It was horrible. I was beaten up and sexually attacked. I tried to commit suicide twice.I met a woman and we had a son.I was drafted for the army during the Vietnam War, but didn’t pass the physical.So, later on when guys got together and started telling war stories, I joined in with mine. Lies.
Telling the truth now will be hard to do, but it will liberate you from the burden you’ve been carrying. The truth will also liberate your son from unknowingly perpetuating this lie later on. The way to have a hard conversation is to preface it by stating: “This is very hard for me to say. I’m worried about your reaction. I hope you will understand, and I hope you will find a way to forgive me for what I’m about to tell you.”
Dear Amy: Every year, we host an exchange teacher’s aide from Latin America, as part of our child’s elementary school dual language program.He has given us unsolicited gifts; these are souvenirs from American cities and theme parks he’s visited. A very kind gesture to be sure, and we thanked him.I believe they would be meaningful mementoes for him to bring home.Dear Parents: Even though your motive is kind, no, I don’t believe there is a polite way to give back these gifts.
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