A mother is scared she will lose her daughter to alcoholism.
I have a 49-year-old daughter who is an elementary school teacher. She became an alcoholic during covid. She has a master’s degree, a beautiful home, and a partner of nine years. She will lose it all, due to her drinking.
She won’t go to AA, and I have suggested inpatient rehab — to no avail. It is breaking my heart. Her father died from cirrhosis of the liver due to alcoholism at 57, and I’m scared I will lose her, too. She has a twin sister and a brother.Your daughter is aware of the worst-case outcome if her addiction spirals, untreated, and if she is unable to attain and maintain sobriety. She knows this because she has felt the consequences and the loss from end-stage alcoholism.
For your own sake, you should maintain some boundaries. Don’t serve alcohol to her in your home. Don’t make excuses for her. Don’t let her alcoholism run your life. Offer to support her recovery, but don’t enable her addiction. Read, or reread, “Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself,” by Melody Beattie .My husband is a wonderful man. We’ve been married more than 40 years.
As someone who has fought your own battle with obesity, perhaps your husband could rehearse a conversation with you. Maybe it’s time to discuss obesity as a disease, instead of a character flaw.” insisted that their daughter had to get As and Bs in college. I think you were off-base in calling this rule “dumb.”
College is ridiculously expensive. We told our daughters: “If I am getting out of bed every morning to earn money to pay your tuition, you are getting out of bed to go to class and get at least a B. Or you will foot that bill.” All four of our daughters were held to this standard. Not all of them believed us until they were due to pay their loans.The thing is, college isn’t for everyone. And college isn’t for everyone aged 18.
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