It’s not that I don’t feel close to my identity as a trans woman. It’s that I feel equally close to my identity as a lesbian.
But no matter what clothes I wear or how much I know about, there will always be defining experiences lost to me. Friends talk about the first time they knew they were gay, the first time they had sex with a woman, and the first time they introduced a girlfriend to their family. I can only share the first time I knew I was trans, the first time I had an orgasm after taking oestrogen, and the first time I saw my family while presenting as a woman.
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