Best Parts Of Trump’s $60 ‘God Bless The USA’ Bible

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Best Parts Of Trump’s $60 ‘God Bless The USA’ Bible
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Donald Trump recently announced on Truth Social that he has teamed up with country music artist Lee Greenwood to sell a custom “God Bless The USA” Bible for $59.99. Here is everything we know about the bespoke religious text that the former president is hawking.

Scholarly Annotations By Kevin Sorbo The MAGA loyalist and Hercules: The Legendary Journeys star provides insightful historical notes throughout. Drippings From Trump’s Cheeseburger The grease stains appearing midway through the Gospel of Mark were only made on a few copies, which are now limited-edition collector’s items. Part Where Jesus Encounters 5,000 Hungry People And Runs Them Over With Pickup Truck Other Bibles just gloss over this miracle.

Blasphemy Matches The inside cover includes a set of easy-strike matches for burning all heretical, non-Trump versions of the Bible. Eric Trump Chew Marks He got ahold of a few copies, sorry. Upgradable For an extra $20 you can get one that says adultery is okay. Illuminations Of Jesus Participating In Jan. 6 Apparently Christ the Lord would’ve gladly hung Mike Pence.

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