She worries her boyfriend sees her as a sex maid since he pays the rent and expects her to do all the chores.
My boyfriend and I both are in our mid-20s and moved in together this summer. He makes more money than I do and also gets help from his family, while I have student loans and get no help. He suggested that he pay the rent while I do the laundry, cooking and cleaning. I was okay with this deal, since I’d been doing all that stuff anyway, but I’ve started to worry about how he sees me because of it.
Since moving in, I found out he wanted me to do that stuff because he’s never done any of it. His parents did everything for him. Literally everything, including his laundry, making all appointments for him and paying all his bills — providing the money and sending it off, too. His dad even put gas in his car every time it needed it.
Now my boyfriend acts like gassing up his own car and paying his own bills is such a big, stressful deal. Also, he hasn’t made one appointment since we moved in together. He recently asked whether I would book his haircuts and dental appointments for him. When I said no, he got really upset and brought up how he pays the rent.My best friend says he views me as a maid he has sex with.
For funsies, though, let’s say your boyfriend doesn’t see you as just a sex maid. Let’s say he loves you for who you are.Then you’d still have the problem of his petulance, helplessness and petulant helplessness. That is not just an “Oh, his parents did everything” problem. Because:· Sometimes parents who try to do everything get shut down by their kids, who actually want to take care of themselves.
Therefore, when someone raised in a cave sees daylight for the first time when he’s in his 20s, and his response is to flood you with shame and assignments as he races back into the darkness, you can say the problemStart small. Your boyfriend should do ONE chore, something, anything: sweeping, toilet cleaning, dusting, unloading the dishes. That is still “fair” in a he-pays-more, you-do-more split. If he can’t do even one chore, then, yes, you’re the maid, and you should leave.
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