'The image on the screen becomes another way to obsessively check and fixate on facial features'
A few months ago, most of us had never heard of Zoom. Now, stuck in lockdown, the video conference platform has become the main way we stay in touch with friends, attend work meetings and attempt to recreate our day-to-day interactions.
‘Video calls are some grey cloud hanging over me constantly, just knowing that damned meeting is in my calendar,’ Rosie tells Metro.co.uk. ‘I am an incredibly self conscious person, having previously, years ago, been housebound due to panic attacks ignited by the idea of other people seeing me. I was so fixated on my own repulsiveness and size.’Those with BDD often engage in time consuming compulsive rituals and behaviours such as mirror checking, excessive grooming and reassurance seeking.
‘Both my jobs require frequent zoom calls and I find it hard to see how everyone else appears, singing and dancing with their well-groomed demeanours,’ says Rosie. ‘It makes me feel like even more of a failure in comparison. ‘It was causing me to binge eat and not step outside because I felt so ugly and disgusting. I have had to go back on antidepressants,’ she says.
Kitty Wallace, Head of Operations at the BDD Foundation, tells us that she’s been getting emails everyday during the lockdown from those struggling with their body image and seeking support. Some are desperate, even suicidal.
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