ESTHER RANTZEN: I asked Mail readers to help me plan my funeral. Your choices

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ESTHER RANTZEN: I asked Mail readers to help me plan my funeral. Your choices
FemailCancerEsther Rantzen
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I have been completely overwhelmed by the kindness, and the talent, of literally hundreds of people who sent me the help I desperately needed. So thank you all so much.

The wonderful privilege of working on television is that you actually join your audience in their own homes, like real friends. Only, our viewers have the added advantage that when we’re boring or irritating, they can just switch us off.

Like him, I decided I’d like my service to contain music and readings I love, not all gloomy, plenty of laughter. But how to choose? Prior to my public plea, I had got as far as choosing my favourite poet, John Donne, and his lovely poem starting: ‘Sweetest love, I do not go for weariness of thee’. It ends with the magical line ‘They who one another keep alive ne’er parted be’. From the sublime to the very funny, I also chose Pam Ayres’ poem ‘Oh, I Wish I’d Looked After Me Teeth.’ My thoughts exactly.

While the show was on the air, every time I stumbled over a paving stone or failed to back into a parking space, someone watching would shout ‘That’s life, Esther!’ I would have to smile appreciatively. Not easy. So although everyone else would of course enjoy its appropriateness, that song might cause me an involuntary shudder in the afterlife.

That said, at my husband’s funeral we began with a Thought For The Day he had recorded after he’d narrowly survived a heart attack. Somehow having his voice, and his authentic thoughts about life and death, at the very start put his stamp on everything that followed. And it did indeed mean his spirit was there throughout. So I’ll try to record a suitable welcome.

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