'Being a baby must be scary, imagine sleeping at home & you wake up at TJMAXX.'
For some reason, the best tweets always seem to happen on the weekend. Here are some funny ones that recently came across my timeline.found the most incredible pair of vintage jeans at the thrift store today and then turned them around to see… this
whenever i tell somebody psychedelics scare me they be like “ you’re scared of your own mind? “ bitch i am insane shoutout to the army recruiter who called me when i was 17 to join the army and when i said i couldnt because men yelling at me and making me call them sir made me horny he said"that's fine??? wouldnt that mean you want to join MORE????" i think about him all the time
Did so well in a job interview today that it actually made me fear I’m a sociopath. I was reading all of her signals and vibes and mirroring them to her and then building on them and pathologizing them too. We laughed we cried we had many epiphanies.
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