‘I felt like Achilles in a hard hat’: an extract from Boris Johnson’s ‘alternative’ memoir

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‘I felt like Achilles in a hard hat’: an extract from Boris Johnson’s ‘alternative’ memoir
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Unleashed, the former PM’s account of his days in office, is published today. But the comedy writer Ian Martin has offered his own version of events in Unhinged: A Parody

Unleashed, the former PM’s account of his days in office, is published today. But other versions of the truth are also available …

No. He has characteristically omitted from his book all the Cobra meetings he attended in secret, for reasons of national security. He makes no mention of the Christmas he spent personally packing thousands of AstraZeneca vaccine shots. He excludes altogether the late monarch’s adulation of him, how she would dress as a pearly queen for his visits, how they would sing old cockney songs into the small hours.

But I have also corrected the public perception of events which culminated in his being forced out by what he courageously called a “media-driven hoo-hah”. The Guardian has selected some uncontroversial extracts from that ultra-honest timeline, below …The prime minister, Theresa May, resigns after struggling to get parliamentary support for the Brexit deal she agreed with the EU. Boris Johnson says he wants to replace her. The US president, Donald Trump, endorses him.

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