Bed rotting is an act of extended self-care It lets you reset from all the crap of the world until you are ready to stand up straight and embrace it afresh 🖋️ stuheritage regrets not spending more time in bed when he had the chance
Because look at the state of me now. I’m going to turn 43 this year, and I’m constantly weighed down by tons and tons of the most mundane middle-aged responsibilities imaginable. I have a mortgage. I have editors who expect me to work. I have children who, God bless British Summer Time, were woken up by a squadron of megaphone-wielding birds at 4:30am this morning. Laundry needs to be done. Groceries need to be bought.
And bed is the only place I ever want to be. When I wake up, I want to be in bed. When I’m at work, I want to be in bed. When I’m in bed, I’m slightly resentful that sleep will rob me of the pleasure of being in bed. Bed is my one overriding fantasy. There’s a line in the moviewhere Tina Fey says that she dreams about “checking into a hotel and just being in a quiet room by myself.
And Gen Z: this is all coming for you. Sure, you might be tempted to put off bed rotting now, but one day you’ll open your eyes and discover with horror that there simply isn’t any room in your life left for it. And it will hurt. When I was in my twenties, I was advised that this was the time to go and see the world, while I had no financial or emotional ties. So I did. I moved to South Korea and taught children for 18 months. But with hindsight, what a fool I was. Those were 18 months that I could have spent in bed, surrounded by empty mugs and dirty plates, wrapped in a duvet that stank of my bodily secretions, aching from carpal tunnel syndrome developed as a result of dicking around on my phone for hours on end.
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