“He didn’t trick you, and you didn’t create him,” counsels Eva Wiseman in this week’s Ask Eva column for British Vogue. “His new girlfriend is not superior to you, nor even the lucky recipient of your arduous relationship efforts. He’s somebody you once loved, and you’re better now for it.
Dear Eva, I’m writing this after coming home from a party where I met my ex and his new fiancée for the first time, and my main feeling is fury. We were together for two years, and in that time I had lots of trouble getting him to be affectionate or communicative, yet there he was tonight, holding her hand and kissing her.
Which was a good thing! It was. You didn’t fit, and that’s fine, and you were honest about it, and that’s brave. It would have been awful, wouldn’t it, if you’d remodelled yourself to accommodate him, pretended you were content being entirely independent, then woken up one day with, I don’t know, the right side of your body entirely frozen due to your internal contortions. That polite, crushing pain.
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