Birkin is often cited as the first, the ultimate, “cool girl”. I don’t begrudge Birkin any of this What I do find a bit appalling, though, is the industry that has sprung up around the idea of the cool girl 💬 via ipaperviews
But truly being a cool girl hasn’t really got anything to do with what you wear. An authentic cool girl must have all the entry-level qualities, plus two magic ingredients, which are, one, a drifty, dreamy security that no matter what you get up to, things will work out OK in the end. And two, a total rejection of shame: shame does not apply to you, no matter what you do, if you are a cool girl. This is not because you are a cool girl, it’s why you are a cool girl.
I have, so many times, hovered over the “buy” button on the Sézane website, droolingly in love with the aesthetic, before I come to my senses and remember that I have got a 34C chest and if I wore an oversized shirt open to the naval I would be arrested. Giant earrings make me look deranged. And who can manufacture that genuine cool girl insouciance? Even now, with a home and a family I’m not completely sure that things will work out OK in the end. I remember very well the precariousness of my life aged 23 and I’ve never really shaken it off. I’ve never had the confidence to be as mute or diffident as cool girls usually are. I feel compelled to talk and tell jokes. Silence, I’ve always thought, implies you think you’re enough just to look at.
And the shame thing? The older I get the more I understand how much all of our choices and decisions in life are motivated by the avoidance of shame., who said, “my worst fear is people on the internet calling me fat. It’s just hell. I can’t shut it out. Any smart thing I’ve said is completely negated if someone calls me that.” Her life is soaked, even with talent, success and an adoring fanbase on her side,Shame is that powerful, it’s that pervasive and it is a real threat.
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