Manipulators are experts at turning the tables, but they can be stopped.

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Manipulators are experts at turning the tables, but they can be stopped.
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Manipulators are experts at turning the tables, but they can be stopped.

In healthy relationships, people can voice their feelings, and their partner will listen with empathy.

This phenomenon can leave you feeling perplexed and drained, wondering if your emotions are valid at all. Unfortunately, this pattern of emotional manipulation is not uncommon, and it often stems from a calculated strategy. This sequence, succinctly encapsulated by the acronym DARVO, serves as a blueprint for manipulative tactics aimed at shifting blame and preserving the perpetrator’s power. Through DARVO, perpetrators not only absolve themselves of responsibility but also undermine the credibility and agency of their victims—perpetuating a cycle of abuse and manipulation:, the perpetrator refuses to acknowledge their actions or the consequences thereof.

Although Alex was undeniably the instigator in this situation, he somehow shifts the narrative to portray himself as the victim. With a mix of deflection and emotional manipulation, Alex might say, “I can’t believe you’re being so mean to me. You always put words in my mouth and make me feel like a bad person.” This not only deflects attention from his own hurtful behavior but also places the blame squarely on Sam, leaving her feeling unjustly accused and guilty.

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