Miss Manners: Do we have to reciprocate a dinner with people we don’t like?

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Miss Manners: Do we have to reciprocate a dinner with people we don’t like?
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Advice from Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin.

: A pair of neighbors hosted my wife and me for an impromptu dinner, to which we contributed a nice salad. The food was fine, the apartment lovely. We have sent them a thank-you note.

We’re sure to see them again. We all live in a nice retirement community, where there are restaurants and a lot of socializing.

I had been using this valet service for about four months when, as the attendant brought my car back to me, he said that gratuities are not expected, but are very much appreciated. He said this in a very calm, professional, not at all demanding voice.I was taken aback and felt that it was forward, and I now have that little voice in my head suggesting that I am in the wrong.

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