Men are often implicitly and explicitly taught to suffer in silence. These outdated and unhelpful gender narratives can impede healthy coping with normal problems such as anxiety.
These myths cause many men to suffer in silence.tough guy Tony Soprano laments the lack of men like actor Gary Cooper, whom he describes as “the strong, silent type.” Cooper, in his multitude of roles portraying tough, no-nonsense old-west lawmen and gunslingers, symbolizes an outmoded though still prevalent depiction of masculinity: men shouldn’t emote, cry, complain, struggle, or ask for help.
The myth of toughness dictates that anything other than strength in the face of challenge is weakness. Life and its complexities, however, reveal the ridiculousness of this conclusion. Daily, we face uncertainty, worry,, fatigue, and transition. To think that we should always keep our feelings about these complexities inside is essentially promoting emotional suppression and. To say that this is an unhealthy response is an understatement. But I bought into it at one time in my life.
When I finally went to therapy, I had a wonderful, compassionate therapist who told me, “Your feelings are always right for you.” This was a sea change for me, someone was telling me for the first time that my feelings—no matter what they happened to be—were acceptable. This meant that I needn’t feel weak or pathetic for being anxious. It had nothing to do with gender and was more about being human.
Now, two decades later, I see many males of all ages in my therapy practice and the work of deconstructing harmful and unhelpful narratives of masculinity is often paramount to our work. We are allowed to struggle, to cry, to ask for help, and to let go of stoicism and needing to be the “strong, silent type.” Much like the therapist who opened this door for me, I try to help my male clients allow themselves to experience their feelings without destructive, gender-based self-judgment.
United Kingdom Latest News, United Kingdom Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
Personal Perspective: Oregon has an overdose problem prisons won't fix.Personal Perspective: Oregon is set to repeal its drug decriminalization measure. Here's why that's a mistake.
Read more »
Personal Perspective: How may unprocessed grief be holding you back?Personal Perspective: Do you find yourself feeling stuck or held back by strong emotions? You may have unprocessed grief that is the source of some difficulties in your life.
Read more »
Personal Perspective: Analyzing Donald Trump with help from Greek mythology.A Personal Perspective: Like the Greek god Dionysus, Donald Trump draws strength from efforts to eliminate him.
Read more »
Personal Perspective: Heal with the wisdom of nature.A Personal Perspective: Spending much time with old-growth forests, I find time and again that nature is a powerful salve that assists in healing and providing wisdom to wounds.
Read more »
Personal Perspective: Gullibility in a theory of aesthetics.Why are some modern art works worth many millions of dollars while others of equal quality are almost worthless? This is a topic that social psychologists to explore.
Read more »
Personal Perspective: When mental health professionals have problems to solve.Even our mental health providers—our psychiatrists, psychologists, counselors, and coaches—sometimes have problems to solve and need someone "confidential" to talk to.
Read more »