'I want a healthy relationship with my mum, but it'll never happen'
I really feel for you, as my mother had abusive behaviour towards me growing up. Name calling, being constantly compared to my brother and never living up to his standards, etc. I often wonder if this a second child syndrome? Anyway, being pregnant with my second now I know I will do everything in my power to ensure equal treatment among my children.
I also don't want my son to miss out having grandparents, as both in laws are deceased, and I know my son is particularly fond of my dad. So yes, relationships aren't easy, I've certainly learned that they take work and particularly where there are vulnerabilities, that boundaries need to be set up. If I see my mum engaging with my son in a way I disagree with, I correct her and let my child know it is ok what he's doing, I also have a strong partner who backs me up.
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