Referent power is potent because it doesn’t require that a leader micromanage, use coercion, or reward to influence others.
—paraphrased quote from Mahatma Gandhiwhen people perceive that your rank in a formal hierarchy—e.g., manager, CEO, or president—gives you the right to “prescribe” their behaviorwhen people feel “oneness” with you or a desire to be like you, leading to their respect and admiration of you
There’s a lot of advice on how to be a better leader—and an overwhelming amount on how to be a better parent . But referent power keeps it simple: Show, don’t tell. Think of it as a check-and-balance system for your behaviors and expectations as a leader. If you don’t want someone else doing something, then you shouldn’t do it, or if you don’t want to do it, then maybe it isn’t fair to ask someone else to do it. If you want your employees, coworkers, or children to develop healthy habits, you need to model those habits.
More good news: You don’t need to be a perfect superhero to leverage referent power. It doesn’t mean never messing up. It means understanding why you fell off track and fixing the source of the distraction.Among the various types of motivation, intrinsic motivation has the highest level of autonomy—one of three psychological nutrients that people need for motivation and psychological well-being, according to self-determination theory by researchers Edward Deci and Richard Ryan.
To leverage referent power, focus on the values you want to uphold in your workplace—values your employees have confirmed as important—and emulate those. You don’t need to be perfect or liked by everyone.We’ve all heard the saying, “Do as I say, not as I do.” However, that common adage is pointless to tell kids because they are undoubtedly taking note of what adults do.”: Children “observe and model another individual’s behavior, attitudes, or emotional expressions.
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