Saying no can be challenging for many people due to various anxieties and concerns. This article explores the reasons behind the difficulty of saying no and the benefits associated with learning to say it.
Here’s a common malfunction that occurs when well-intentioned people open their mouths to say no: The word “yes” tumbles out instead. We’ve all been there, says Vanessa Bohns, department chair and professor of organizational behavior at Cornell University. No is a deceptively short, simple word that can trigger several layers of anxiety for the person trying to say it.
For starters: What does it reveal about our character? “We worry that we’re essentially communicating that we’re not a helpful person; we’re not a nice, kind person; we’re not a team player,” Bohns says. “We’re too lazy to take something on, or we don’t want to work hard.” At the same time, she adds, we’re likely stressing over how that “no” might offend the other person, and what it conveys about our relationship with them. As Bohns puts it, you might think “it’s telling the person, ‘Your standing with me is not what you thought it was. We’re not actually that close.’” In reality, however, such concerns are often overblown. In fact, there’s an array of benefits associated with learning to say n
Saying No Difficulty Anxiety Benefits Learning
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