If we sit with our anger long enough, we discover it's grief, often built up over time, and made up of the small disappointments and larger losses we experience over our life span.
Grief is not linear. It occurs in more of a spiral.. That grief has often built up over time, and is made up of the small disappointments and larger losses we experience over our life span—what in Buddhist psychology are often referred to as"little deaths." Post-modern psychology might characterize this same experience as a sort of demure complex, introduced us to what she codified as the five stages of grief.
We throw a tantrum because our car won’t start and we’re going to be late for that job we so dislike. We manhandle our dog because she’s perfectly content where she is on the couch, but"she needs to go out." We yell at our kid because, once again, they didn’t put their dishes in the sink.This is not true, discernable anger. It is existential anger misplaced because we hurt, we don’t feel in control, we don’t know why, and, more to the point, we are imposing ourselves. Enter ego.
Releasing our reactions leaves us confronting the genuine emotions we have been working so hard to deny. This is something many Eastern teachers, both yogic and Buddhist, refer to as “sitting in our sh*t.” Western commentators, on the other hand, may more decorously characterize it as “confronting our emotions.”and calling it what it is. Our losses—big, small, or simply incidental—have us lost, and we are, in some cases, not just angry, but mad—out of our minds, and not in a good way—about it.
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