Martin Zubimendi would be ‘useful’ as Premier League table predicted

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Martin Zubimendi would be ‘useful’ as Premier League table predicted
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The full Premier League table is predicted as Martin Zubimendi plays an unusually large part. Plus, thoughts on Chelsea racism and more.

1. Manchester City – same old, unfortunately. Haaland will be well-rested and firing. Things could change if Rodri, the world’s most important player, were to be sidelined. They currently don’t have a Zubimendi waiting in the wings, more on him later. Savio arrives with low fanfare but is a typical Pep player. Controversial pathway via two of their ‘sister clubs’. I’ve just learned there’s 12 of them, wow. Quiz question to name them all.

5. Newcastle – no Europe, so on the proviso Bruno G, Gordon and Isak stay and stay fit, fifth seems attainable. Livramento is class so Trippier should be on his way. Hall should be England’s left back before long. Howe could be England’s manager before long. Pochettino would be a good fit if so. Funny transfer dealings Team 2.

9. Tottenham – they had a great start but I dare say they’ve been found out. Son is 32 and they haven’t replaced Kane’s goals or fixed their defence. Bergvall and Gray are exciting signings but, as with Yoro, inexperience is the immediate stumbling block. Should sign Toney, if possible. 13. Everton – Sean Dyche doing Sean Dyche things. Organised. 1-0s on repeat versus poorer teams and Arsenal between humblings to the other top six sides. Onana is a big loss, but they’ll probably keep Branthwaite. Funny transfer team number 5, Tim Iroegbunam for 9 million

17. Fulham – Pahlinha’s true value will be recognised now that he has gone. Smith-Rowe is a very good player, but with a question mark over his ability to stay fit. Muniz didn’t make it at Boro, but astonishingly appears to be realising his potential as Mitrovic’s heir to the Fulham throne. Tosin is a big loss too. Tim Ream must be pushing 50.

So I won’t be able to ignore the football for the whole season but I’ll try and ignore Stewie for the whole term.How can a player who plays on a team with a lot of black players – in a league where the teams take a knee before the game to remind everyone that racism exists, is real, and is hurtful – sing a totally racist song?

FIFA, UEFA, The FA, every club, talk a good game about stamping out racism / homophobia but as soon as it might impact their bottom line they disappear. Absolute cowards. We are long past the time, at least in football, where national teams were used to promote cultural identities and nationalism. It’s so global now.

My first thought was fun but impractical, the idea that in knock-out games during a tournament we went full “win or go home” so if the game ended in a draw, both teams are eliminated. I’d love to see it, but the logistics of making it practical would be insane.

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