'Women are still lumped with the emotional labour of Christmas – How I’m tackling it and you can too' ⬇️ From budgeting to family diplomacy, sharing the small stuff will ease the burden
Helen Norbury. “As a woman, you automatically take on the caring role, the main emotional support in a family. And it’s a 24/7 job, with no deputy or time off from it,” she says. While most men are capable of taking on that role – and happy to do so – society doesn’t expect it from them so it’s not so instinctive. They don’t feel the same pressure to do this .
Norbury is seeing more women coming to her on the brink because of this pressure – combined with the cost of living crisis. “Without exception, with everyone I’m speaking to, it’s weighing on their mind, regardless of their financial position.” So how do we ease up on ourselves? According to Hoggenboom, the best way is to start with a simple acknowledgement of who does what in the family. Write out a list of tasks and agree on who is going to take ownership. But make it detailed, think about all those micro chores you don’t even realise you’re doing.
It’s a vicious circle, says Hoggenboom: the more we become good at things , the more people rely on us to do them. “We should think twice about doing it ourselves because it’s easier than explaining it to our partner.”
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